As a registered Relationship Counsellor and Leadership Coach, I have worked in and alongside Human Services teams for over twenty-five years. Each time I am invited to work with a new team, I am reminded of the vital importance of open, honest communication, in the development of trust and team cohesion. They don’t come without courageous conversations.
These are qualities that must be modelled at the head of the table if they are to be taken seriously by the organisation at large. And there’s no better place to start than the Board and Executive Leadership Team.
Situation, Behaviour, Impact (S.B.I.)
Providing feedback – whether in a professional or personal context – can provoke anxiety. Presenting a person with the frank, unvarnished truth of how we feel about something they have said or done is challenging. It may feel like it goes against our strong desire for harmony and the avoidance of conflict.
So, it’s no wonder that we have often been taught to ‘sandwich’ our ‘negative’ feedback between two slices of ‘positive’ feedback. The problem with this is that it strengthens the narrative that receiving feedback is undesirable. A more helpful message is that feedback can be a gift if we use it to learn and grow.
The SBI framework* provides a safe and supportive scaffold, for the provision and receipt of feedback, both ‘appreciative’ and ‘developmental’.
Appreciative Feedback
Sometimes called ‘affirming’ feedback, this is where we share our appreciation of a person’s behaviour (words or actions). When we build habits of regularly providing appreciative feedback, the provision of developmental feedback does not feel like such a daunting leap. I deliberately refrain from using the terms ‘positive’ and ‘negative’ when talking about feedback, as all feedback is helpful when it is provided thoughtfully.
Developmental Feedback
Sometimes called ‘constructive’ feedback, this is where we address a behaviour which we assess as unhelpful (within a personal or professional setting). Our intention in providing developmental feedback is to support the other person to reflect upon their behaviour, towards making a positive change.
| S | Situation | Identify the specific situation or context |
|---|---|---|
| B | Behaviour | Describe clearly and accurately the behaviour you observed |
| I | Impact | Explain the impact you experienced or observed |
After providing developmental feedback, it may be helpful to provide space for the other person to share the intentions behind their behaviour, so long as this does not become an exercise in denying or minimising its impacts. This can then lead to a conversation about alternative behaviours.
| I | Intention | Explore the intentions behind the behaviour in question |
|---|---|---|
| AB | Alternative Behaviour | Consider alternative behaviours |
| PI | Potential Impact | Consider potential impacts of the alternative behaviour |
Our secret weapon for building the best culture is open and honest feedback.
*Adapted from the SBI Framework from the Centre for Creative Leadership
Calling Out (and calling in) *
If we are serious about building a team culture that promotes open, honest communication, then it must be a culture which feels psychologically safe to all team members.
According to Harvard Business School’s Dr. Amy Edmondson, psychological safety is experienced when team members feel comfortable sharing concerns and mistakes without fear of embarrassment or retribution.
The maintenance of psychological safety sometimes requires responding to behaviours, in the moment, which threaten this safety. ‘Calling out’ problem behaviour is a particular kind of courageous conversation, characterised by immediacy and sometimes a certain subjectivity.
The aim of calling out behaviour is to maintain psychological safety in the workplace. An example might be responding to a racist, misogynistic or queerphobic word or comment.
If, when, and how we choose to respond to such behaviour will send messages to others in the space about the culture of the organisation and their own level of safety in the workplace.
We might choose to ‘call-out’ the behaviour, or we might choose to ‘call-in’ the behaviour. Depending on our own levels of psychological safety, we may choose to respond from our heart (drawing on our own feelings and lived experience) or from our head (drawing on organisational values, HR principles, legislation, or other evidence).
Calling Out
(characterised by the ‘C’ word, Correction)
When we want to communicate that the behaviour or language is unacceptable and not permitted – usually because we have assessed that it is likely to impact psychological safety in the workplace.
Examples:
- “I want you to know that when you use that word, I feel really hurt” (heart response)
- “I need to let you know that the word you just used is not one we allow in this space” (head response)
- “That comment doesn’t align with the values we hold here” (head response)
- “You may or may not realise this, but you’re talking about me/my story/my community, when you say that” (heart response)
- “I don’t find that joke funny and I’d prefer you don’t make jokes like that here” (heart response)
Calling In
(characterised by the ‘C’ word, Curiosity)
When we want to take time to explore the meanings attached to the behaviours and the intentions behind it. The aim is to deepen mutual understanding and explore alternatives
- “I’m curious. What was your intention when you said that?” (head response)
- What impact do you think that language might have on others in the space? (head response)
- Why do you think that is the case? Why do you believe that to be true? (head response)
- I have a really different view on that. Would you be happy to hear it? (heart response)
- I’m wondering where you learnt to use that word and what it means to you (head response)
Note: We may wish to call out the behaviour whilst calling in the person (I call this ‘naming, but not shaming’)
The academic research is overwhelming: when people believe they can speak up at work, the learning, innovation, and performance of their organizations is greater. Teams and organizations in which people believe that their voices are welcome outperform their counterparts.
*Adapted from Oregon Centre for Educational Equity – What Did You Just Say?
Make the Commitment to Courageous Conversations
At A Single Step, I walk alongside Human Services teams, guiding you through the strengthening of relationships, and the building of inclusive workplaces, towards greater collective purpose and commitment across your organisation.
Visit the Teams page of my website to learn more about our services, or simply call me today, for an informal chat about how I can support your organisation.
